Back at it....

I ran last night. Ok I walk/ran but Lyndsey tells me I RAN! So I'll go with that.

Let 's back up a bit. I am 45 yrs old and as the Indigo Girls like to say "heavier by the year and heavier by the load". I am struggling with this aging idea. Mentally I feel 16 most days. I laugh I cut up I enjoy life mostly. Yet in the last year or so exercise has been hard for me.

I love to walk. I could walk all day long and am frequently excited by a long 5 mile trek. No problem. With the brown eyed boy, I like it even more. As predicted he is not allowed to walk at the moment and I a joining him in a life of sympathetic sloth.

The kicker here is that I have signed up with a bunch of friends to do a Color Run in October. Mostly we will run some per- determined distance in our tennis whites and have chalk thrown at us and come out looking like Neapolitan ice cream I think. It'll be fun. I have to get into shape.

The issue is this. I used to be 16 yrs old and weigh 102 lbs. Yall can fuss at me all you want about that but
I was. I was captain of the track and cross country team. Ran my butt off in August heat and proudly puked at the top of a hill in a fancy neighborhood in Knoxville. I was never fast but I could outlast anyone. I ran at least 8 miles of a half marathon two years ago. I trotted through it and it was fine. I did it and got the t shirt.

I am competing against that 16 yr old and losing badly.

Now? Ack. I need to do this so I won't collapse on this fun run with a bunch of friends watching. It hurts. Ok running is supposed to hurt? I know that mind over matter crap. My knees hurt. My toes hurt. It is hot as hell and I am in peri menopause. Basically that means do not stop me from getting into a cold body of water ASAP at the end of any physical activity.

I have tried the "your patients would give their eye teeth to get up and run" thing. That doesn't work. Frankly I think they would rather feel good enough to sit with their grandkids on their porch.

Yes I am healthy but it still sucks. I have tried the "oh who cares if you're 45, this is good for you!" Whatever. And don't even give me the "body is a temple" speech.

I don't want to feel middle aged....and based on good genes in my family, I am smack it the middle. I just got hearing aids and I need new glasses.

I'll go run tomorrow I guess. I needed a day to rest today.

It will still suck out loud.